Knowing full well that sex before marriage is wrong, we were more interested in discussing why we can’t get away with doing a sin rather than why we shouldn’t sin. The question we posed our teacher could be rephrased in this way: Would you rather have us wear dark clothes while robbing a house, or would you rather us spend 15 years in prison? |
A Confession about Contraception I have not always understood Catholic teaching on some points, largely because I formerly had little interest in understanding the teaching. One such teaching was the Church’s ban on birth control. It seems like such a minor point, likely because fewer than five percent of Catholics in the United States accept the Church’s ban on contraception. However, the use of contraception has always been considered by the Church to be a grave sin against the sanctity of marriage. This remains so, even in the face of opposition and even though many do not follow the teaching. Younger Days In theology class at my Catholic high school, a classmate of mine speaking on behalf of all of us asked our teacher: "Would you rather have people using contraception or would you rather have a bunch of pregnant teenagers?" "I’d rather have unmarried people staying out of bed," the teacher responded. It was laughable and ludicrous to my classmates and me. That wasn’t one of the two choices. Everybody knows they’re going to do it anyway, you might as well be safe. This reaction and the way our question was worded demonstrated that we had become part of a society of ill morality. Knowing full well that sex before marriage is wrong, we were more interested in discussing why we can’t get away with doing a sin rather than why we shouldn’t sin. The question we posed our teacher could be rephrased in this way: Would you rather have us wear dark clothes while robbing a house, or would you rather us spend 15 years in prison? There is no right answer given those two choices. A moral theologian cannot answer such a question without a third option: "I’d rather you not sin." To Sin or … To Sin Twice! A few years later in my college days, one of my former classmates got his girlfriend pregnant. This alone is not of interest since, unfortunately, this happens often in today’s world. What struck me was that the couple said they did not use contraception because they viewed that as a sin. My response to this is difficult to admit. Pointing out that sex before marriage is also a sin, I said (though not to the couple directly), "By having sex, they’re messing up their afterlife. By not using contraception, they’re messing up this life too." Now, a little older and – I hope – a lot wiser, I would not consider saying such a thing, though I am sure there are individuals out there who still ascribe to this mixed up idea. Admittedly, the case of my former classmate and his girlfriend is a strange one. It is ironic that someone would be so careful not to sin while committing another sin, but perhaps it makes more sense than it appears at first. Two unmarried people who have sex commit a sin. Whether they are inflamed by passion or not, they sin. By using contraception, they acknowledge that what they are doing is wrong by acknowledging that they do not want a possible outcome of their sexual union – a child. They realize that they do not have the commitment necessary to join in full communion with each other, but they choose to act as if they do. Chris Mosmeyer |
